theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
it's like heaven, but drunker
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
