Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
