Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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