Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
