I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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