Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
