piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Michael Bay diarrhea
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.