similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.