we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Randomize