It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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