you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.