is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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