I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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