Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
