We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I will pee on everything he values.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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