he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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