we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
