can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
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