Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize