Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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