Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
