Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
where are my pants?
in the oven.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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