so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
