And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
