dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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