THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
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