dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Randomize