Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
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