saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
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His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
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Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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