We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
