i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
