I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Nicole vs. Life
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
