I can feel you judging me through the phone.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Everything about him screamed your future.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I just blew my weed a kiss
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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