It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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