I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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