I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
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oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
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I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
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