wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
