Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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