do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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