I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize