Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
