Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize