But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
