Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
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what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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