Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
