I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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