I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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