i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
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