Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
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I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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