The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
