Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Randomize
